But baby that don’t mean I’m not dang good.
Let me start by just being as open and as honest as I can be. First I am fat…..yes..F A T. Gasp…dear Lord she said the F word. I did. It’s descriptive, it describes my body shape. I don’t remember ever not being fat. I don’t understand and can not comprehend another way of being. But my idea of fat….is it not getting in my way….and finally starting to change the state of my body as of last year. I am slowly changing things and losing weight but have no ambition to ever be truly thin. A size 14 or 16 will be just fine and perfect with me. When it comes to photography, it has made me a person who can ind the beauty in everything.
So with that I say this…when it comes to the photography world, a lot of times it matters if you’re cute and up to date in the world of fashion and upcoming events. It creates this “Rockstar” air about you and makes people want to be like you. I don’t have that going for me…well I’m cute, pretty actually, I’m freaking awesome as a friend and if life gets hard…I’m the girl you want on your side……always. Those are just facts…..ask anyone who really knows me.
But you’re never going to see me wearing the latest fashion and sacrificing my personal beliefs to stand out in the crowd…..because I shouldn’t have to and I won’t. I will march to the beat of my own drum….like I always have. I will be called flower child and hippy because I love wide open. I will push people away because I am transparent and honest and that scares some people away….because they can’t comprehend a truly nice or kind person…..we have society to thank for that……but honestly that’s ok….not everyone likes happy hippy flower child tea, that just means there is more of me for those who do!!! Word. Amen. Lol.
The thing is, I don’t want to rock out the latest fashions, or the latest styles……I want to rock out my CAMERA, while capturing you being a ROCKSTAR at life and love. I do a yearly headshot session and family session. That’s enough for me……I mean I am not my own muse….that would just be weird!!! My clients, those people who I accept into being part of the Suzy G Tribe……they are the ones who matter. Their lives are what I love to capture…….I would much rather do that than shop, or try to impress people with a fake flowy awesomeness. No thank you. It’s not me.
And so I questioned my worth the last 2 years because I was not this “ROCKSTAR” persona. I mean, surely that meant I was just mediocre, plain, boring, no good, and a failure. Guess what…I was wrong and I let an idea almost destroy my dreams inside my heart.
So I realized recently I may not be a ROCKSTAR by some undefined industry standard……..I may not have 5,000 Instagram followers or soar above the crowd on social media……but babe, where it counts…….I am dang good.
And frankly Scarlett……That’s all that matters.